I was out shopping with my mother a few weeks back and I opened the door for a woman and her young son before entering myself. Even though they were a few steps behind me, I made a conscious effort to be courteous- it certainly would not have been rude to simply go through the door and not look back- she was several steps behind me. But, my mother raised me right, and so I waited patiently, holding the door for the woman and her son. The woman not only walked past me without so much as a nod, a smile, eye contact- much less a thank you!- but she passed through to the second set of doors and let it slam right in my face. "Rude," I thought. "I bet your kid is going to grow up to be an a-hole just like you."
Maybe it was wrong of me to expect courtesy in return. After all, it was meant to be a gesture of kindness, and we shouldn't do everything for a reward, right? Should we only say "Thank you" in order to hear a resounding "You're welcome"? Hell yes. This is called "etiquette," people.
Etiquette is defined as the "code of behavior that delineates expectations for social behavior according to contemporary conventional norms within a society, social class, or group." (Thanks Wikipedia!) The anthropological (and etymological) significance of etiquette (deriving from the French meaning "ticket") is that these conventions of social interactions help us communicate with each other, and well, simply share a space together. It is our admission "ticket" to civilized society.
Much like the notion that "common sense" is not, in fact, all that common, I decided to create a blog dedicated to the discussion of modern etiquette. Since Emily Post (God Bless Her) hasn't had a chance to write on situations more complicated than how to respond to an RSVP event invitation, I thought I might tackle the simple mistakes so commonly made in contemporary social scenarios.
What does this include? Top at my list is of course how people behave in public. As someone in the humanities, I have worked part time jobs as a server for years. Now yes, tipping is a delicate (and much disagreed upon) form of etiquette, but I am more concerned with HOW you talk to your server, etc.
I realize the irony of a blog dedicated to etiquette: I am most likely preaching to the converted. If you have the slightest interest in etiquette, your mother has already done right by you. Pat yourself on the back. Now let's see if we can spread the good word on proper social etiquette.
